Saturday, April 10, 2010

"I'm Just One Stomach Flu Away From my Goal Weight" -The Devil Wears Prada

Good news to share...finally! Last post, even though I was sick all week (still am BTW), I hadn't lost any weight in 4 days. Since then, I'm happy to say I'm down 4 more lbs. My eating has been a little bit flawed but overall, I've had a pretty good week.

Wednesday was a good day. I had half of a whole wheat pita with light cream cheese (about 1 tsp) and some lean turkey for breakfast. I also had my coffee (with Coffee Mate and Splenda of course). For lunch I had Lipton's cup-o-noodle soup. I had a really upset tummy that day and found a box of that from God-knows-when in my cubby at work. That stuff rocks...forgot how tasty it is (that might be the cold medicine talking though). I also ate a tomato slice off of my co-workers plate (it had Italian dressing on it too...mmmm). Later that afternoon, I had a banana. For dinner I ate a chicken breast with 3/4 c. brown rice and some light soy sauce. Water with all three meals.

Thursday I had coffee (with CM and Splenda) and a banana for breakfast. That day I had lunch plans with a friend at one of my favorite restaurants. Honestly, I was worried to go there at favorite/usual dishes include chicken nachos (they are organic and made with creme fraiche...the best!) and a burger with gruyere. This is a good friend of mine although one I don't see nearly as often as I'd like. Right when I see her I ask how she's been and she blurts out "I'm fat now....I've gained sooo much weight!" Now, this girl is like 5'10", long blond hair, always tanned with designer handbag in tote. She looks beautiful, as always. I don't notice the weight gain she's referring to but I do notice that she's dyed her hair a slightly darker shade than usual (I like it). I scoff and tell her she looks gorgeous. F is not only one of my prettiest friends, she's probably one of the healthiest eaters I know too. She never drinks soda (always water or iced tea) and usually orders a salad wherever we go. We start catching up with each other. She talks about her love life (gotta love them single gals) and the all the fabulous places she's traveled recently. I talk about moving, my kid and inevitably about my diet/blog (yes, my life is much less glamorous than hers). "Have you read it yet?" I ask. No, she hasn't had time. I tell her a little bit about it and why I'm doing it, yada, yada, yada. She goes on to tell me that she's had food issues for as long as she can remember. Then she starts talking about how when she was a little girl, her mom received endless compliments about how thin and beautiful she was. F says from that very early age, she remembers thinking that she didn't ever want to be anything other than those two things...she wanted to be just like her mom. She says she remembers thinking "I can't eat that...I'll get fat" (ergo I won't be as thin and beautiful as my mom is) as a very young girl. She had an irrational fear (even though she was not an overweight child) that she'd become fat and therefore undesirable. She then tells me that her mom is overweight now. I tell her that my food issues never began until my 30's and that I've generally felt okay with my body. I know this sounds like a contradiction but it's not. I am not UNhappy being overweight; I just want to be thin. There is not some thinking on my part that I will be happier once I am thinner because I'm happy now. At any rate, I did stick to my guns and ordered something healthy - grilled chicken tacos and water (same as F). I skipped the shells and ate the grilled chicken breast along with some black beans and a little pico. And I felt satisfied without feeling stuffed, like I would have if I had gotten the burger. That night I had a cup of whole wheat spaghetti with sauce from the jar and 3 Starburst jelly beans from my kid's Easter basket for dessert.

Friday was a bit worse. I had a half of a whole wheat pita for breakfast with about a TBSP of peanut butter. No coffee - I must've been sick after all. We had a work outing yesterday afternoon and went bowling (we ate lunch there too). I had 2 pieces of pizza - one cheese and one veggie (tossed the crusts) and water. I planned on either having a) one slice of cheese pizza or b) no pizza, but I was really hungry. I don't think that's all that bad considering everyone else was drinking beer too. Last night for dinner I wasn't feeling well so I just ate about a third of my son's leftover hot dog and a bite of his orange jello, before tossing the rest.

For some strange reason I was up a little over a pound this morning from yesterday. Not sure if it was the pizza (salt) or what but I really don't see how it's possible to gain that overnight. I guess that's payback for my poor decision yesterday. I'm hoping after eating healthfully today and tomorrow, I'll be back down to 164 by Monday morning.

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