Tuesday, April 27, 2010

Something's Gotta Give

Remember that "mood" I was in when I last posted? Well, I'm sorry to say that it has not gone away. Must be the curse still. I'm normally a pretty light-hearted person (admittedly with crotchety patches interjected here and there) but I'm feeling really ornery this week. And yes, I've gotten plenty of sleep although people keep asking me that. Apparently I have puffy eyes and it looks like I've "been up all night". Whatever.

I half thought about just lying and saying I was down another pound...just so I didn't have to explain myself, but you know I would never lie to you. So here goes. We had company in town all weekend and although I didn't eat super healthy, I didn't throw all caution to the wind either. Without getting into too much detail, because as I stated...I'm in no mood today, I will recap the highlights (or in this case, the low lights). Thursday night for dinner I had pizza - about 5 squares - 2 pepperoni and 3 Canadian bacon and pineapple (they were thin crust). I also had two glasses of Cabernet.

Friday I ate cereal for breakfast (think high fiber) with fat free milk and a tangerine. I also had coffee. One thing I will let you in on is that I have stopped using Splenda in my coffee and am getting used to just creamer. Hopefully someday I'll be able to cut that out too. I really admire all you black coffee drinkers out there - wish I could be as cool as you. For lunch I had pizza again (thin crust organic). I ate four slices - two chicken sausage and fennel and two roasted garlic and kale. I also had a small summer salad with vinaigrette. To drink - iced green tea (I hope to make this a more frequent occurrence - loved it). For dinner that night I had tequila lime chicken fettuccine. I won't even try to justify this....other than to reiterate that I had family in town and I didn't pick the menu. Alas, it wasn't even whole wheat pasta.

Saturday I can't remember what I had for breakfast or lunch (sad face here). No, I did not write it down or anything this weekend for that matter. Do you have to bust my chops on everything? Sheesh. For dinner that night we had all the relatives over and made pulled pork sandwiches (with bbq sauce). I also had some potato chips and dip. Furthermore, I had two grape vodka and Pellegrino drinks (thus the lapse in judgment about the chips and dip). Pretty healthy as far as alcohol goes. My parents brought over dessert - chocolate molten cake and ice cream. This is probably my favorite dessert of all time and I did not have one bite. Impressive methinks.

Sunday I had chicken chow mein at brunch (don't even ask) and it was really salty and delicious. I didn't make it so I'm not really sure about the extent of how healthy (or unhealthy) it was, but I enjoyed it nonetheless. Sunday night for dinner I had a hamburger on the grill (topped with cheese) - it was organic, lean meat. I did have a whole wheat bun. On the side, I had baked beans, asparagus and a few pickles.

Yesterday I had cereal with fat free milk and a banana for breakfast. I also had a tall Starbucks non-fat vanilla latte. For lunch I had Subway - 6" wheat with turkey and ham, a little bit of mayo and lettuce. No chips and water to drink. For dinner last night we had steak and I'll admit, I pigged out. I was starving. I also had TWO helpings of garlic mashed potatoes and some corn. I used real butter on both the potatoes and corn. Shameless...I know.

In a nutshell, I'm still the same weight I was last week but I'm not sure if it's because of the water weight (associated with my "friend") or because I haven't really "dieted" this week. Either way, it sucks. And there you have it. Tune in next time where your author promises to get a hold of herself and embrace her (formerly) positive attitude!

Thursday, April 22, 2010

Sometimes That's Just the Way it Goes...

Okay, I'll be honest...I'm kind of in a funk today. I thought I was doing pretty well on this diet (ahem...lifestyle change). I mean, losing 2-3 lbs. per week (without exercise, mind you), = some pretty good willpower...at least it does to me.

This week I've been anticipating (WARNING: this will be TMI for a few of you men out there) a visit from my favorite Aunt and I've slacked a bit. I want to reassure you that when I say I've "slacked", I have not eaten a donut or even had a diet coke...I have just consumed more pasta than normal (albeit whole wheat) and have snacked a tad bit more on items that did not fall into the fruits and vegetables category. At any rate...I'm not down this week so far but I'm not up either...which is a feat considering water weight is a given during this special time.

I want to do something a little different here. I'm not in the mood to relay all my food choices but I'll just say I have been relatively consistent with other weeks. Sometimes when you're in a funk, the best thing to do is to focus on the positive...so here goes:

1) There were cupcakes (with frosting about 2 inches thick on them) at a meeting this morning and I didn't even glance at the table.

2) I've been putting less creamer in my coffee every day, thereby cutting extra sugar and calories.

3) A friend at work remarked the other day that my pants looked like they were "falling off me" and my mom said the same thing last night (I will buy a few "transitional" pairs when I lose another 10 lbs.).

4) It's okay if I don't lose every single week, as long as I keep eating well.

Sometimes, you just hit a rough patch...it's not the end of the world. This is more of an emotional one (thanks Aunt Flo) than a physical one for me. After all, I'm already almost a quarter of the way to my goal and I will succeed, even if I feel "off" for a few days.

Monday, April 19, 2010

Is This Thing Broken?

Okay...so I was really not looking forward to writing this blog. I told my mom as much at dinner last night. I did not weigh myself all weekend in anticipation that the scale would go way up thanks to my imprudent eating habits over the weekend. I was certainly expecting the worst. I didn't fall off the wagon, per se, but I did give myself much more leeway than I have been these past four weeks. I also did not write down anything over the weekend so I tried to remember today what I had eaten during the past four days...but you and I both know how well a mind that is nearly 40 works.

Friday I believe I skipped breakfast again...too busy (yeah, yeah, yeah). That day for lunch a friend/colleague of mine and I went out. We decided to go to a restaurant that's about 2 miles from the office, one we had meant to go to for the past three years but had never made it to (and incidentally will never go back to...not great). I was really hungry (since I hadn't eaten all day) and I ordered a turkey and Swiss sandwich. It had the regular fixings on it - lettuce, tomato...oh, and BBQ sauce and mayo, which I MEANT to get on the side and 86 the BBQ sauce all together but forgot. I chose cottage cheese as my side (and yes, french fries were an option). I drank water. The bread appeared to be "white" but had caraway seeds in it, which I despise...so I only ate the bread on one half. That night I met friends out for dinner at a restaurant that favors healthy fare. I ordered a vegetarian Caesar (they call it that because the dressing has no anchovies...it's a black olive dressing) and a wood-fired pizza that had red sauce, chicken sausage, mushrooms and fennel. It was delicious...ate three pieces and brought the rest home for my hubby. I had sparkling water despite the fact that one of my friends (the other wasn't drinking as she had an early race the next day) ordered a glass of red wine that looked simply divine. But I resisted. After dinner we took my son next door for ice milk - chocolate and vanilla with mini M & Ms...I had two bites.

Saturday I had half of a whole wheat English muffin for breakfast with about one TBSP of organic peanut butter and coffee. I didn't eat lunch but snacked on a banana and a huge glass of Pellegrino with lime...probably a few other small things too but my aged mind cannot recall at this point. That night was date night and my husband and I went to a steakhouse. I decided I would take the night off for all intents and purposes. First off, I ordered an orange slice martini. It was delicious! My hubby ordered a Long Island iced tea and his was so good that I ordered one after my martini. We shared it though and I only ended up drinking about a quarter of it. For an appetizer, we ordered the Mushrooms Neptune, which our 22-year-old waiter happily announced was their "signature" appetizer - mushrooms stuffed with crab and cream cheese...they were awesome! For my entree, I ordered a 7 oz. filet (the smallest on the menu) wrapped in bacon. The waiter imparted that this was the leanest cut of red meat they had...not that I asked. Great waiter BTW - why aren't there more like him?! Anyway, I could've gotten a baked potato (ho hum) but I opted for the twice-baked which was out of this world...worth each and every calorie. We did look at the dessert menu and although there were some winners on it, we decided against, which is a big deal for me...I am such a dessert person. My husband, on the other hand, could live without dessert for the rest of his life and be just fine. I felt satisfied though without it so I listened to my gut (pun intended) and informed the waiter that I had ingested my dessert before the meal (the orange slice martini).

The next day I was feeling somewhat guilty but let it go. After all, my husband and I don't go out much and when we do go out, we tend to hit Applebee's or something equally uninspiring. Hey, it's super loud in there...your two-year-old can yell as loudly as he wants and nobody will hear thanks to their cranked up 80's music. Sunday afternoon a girlfriend came over to lay out with me and was nice enough to bring us lunch. She brought turkey sandwiches (on white bread), cold pasta salad (my favorite) and fruit salad. And of course cookies (she had gotten Paradise Bakery....NOBODY can resist their cookies). The sandwich did have bacon on it but she didn't know if I wanted mayo or mustard so she ordered it dry figuring I could add my own. Normally I would've but I was so hungry that I ate half, sans mayo. I put the other half in the fridge. I had about three or four bites of pasta salad and ate the small cookie later that afternoon. I had LaCroix with it. That afternoon for a snack I also ate a banana. For dinner last night I had half of a small turkey burger, about four bites of my son's cheddar hamburger (no bun on either) and about half a cup of sweet potato fries. I baked them with a little salt, pepper and olive oil (no butter).

This morning I had coffee and half of a whole wheat pita with organic peanut butter for breakfast. I ate a banana for a mid-morning snack. For lunch I had a small, leftover turkey burger and about 12 cherry tomatoes. I was hungry again a few hours later and had 2 TBSP of organic peanut butter and a cup of fat free cocoa. I was craving chocolate and although it's not terrific, for 25 calories, it fills the void. For dinner tonight I had a salad with a few cherry tomatoes, some red onion and a small amount of shredded cheddar cheese. I had about 2 TBSPs of Light Hidden Valley Ranch on it. I also ate about 3/4 c. of whole wheat spaghetti with 1/2 c. of sauce (from the jar) and a sprinkling of Parmesan cheese.

Now...back to the weigh-in this morning. I braced myself as I stepped on the scale and fully expected to gain at least 2 lbs. But instead, I had lost 5 ounces. I have no idea how or why but I weighed myself again after my shower and the same weight appeared...163.3. Maybe it will catch up with me tonight or maybe I wasn't as bad as I really thought...? I don't know. But I do know this...as much as I veered from my regular "I'm on a big diet" diet, I still ate at least 80% better than I would've over the same weekend two months ago so I guess that's something.

Thursday, April 15, 2010

Average...Yet Obese

I once read that the average woman in America is 5'4 and a size 12. I have been both a size 12 (okay, or 14) and 5'4 (go figure) for most of my adult life. So I guess it shouldn't have surprised me this morning when an article I was reading stated that 63.1% of Americans are now overweight or obese. Yes, you heard me correctly - 63%! I was curious what constituted obesity in the American Health Association's eyes, so I went to the linked BMI calculator. You enter your height and weight and the calculator spits out your rating, e.g. tells you if you're fat, or as they put it "prone to health risks", average...which they refer to as "desirable" or obese. God I hate that word, it's just ugly. So first I put in my current weight (and height, obviously) to see what category I presently fall into and then I continued putting in numbers to see what category I'd be in if I gained, lost, etc. Anything above 171 and I was labeled obese...which seems harsh and is really pretty mortifying considering the fact that I've weighed more than that for most of my adult life. Jeez, I know I'm no supermodel but OBESE? Really? At my current weight of 163 lbs., I fall into the "prone to health risks" category and I will remain there until I weigh less than 148 lbs., when I'll officially become "desirable". I was curious to see what the cateogy lower than "desirable" was (fabulous?) and if you'd have to reach utter emaciation before falling into it. Turns out you are "desirable" if you fall anywhere between 107 and 148 lbs., at 5'4 anyway. This means that I am an estimated 15 lbs. heavier than the top of my "desirable" weight, which I guess I can buy...thus the diet. Seems like 107 would be an extremely low weight though for an average-build woman like me. I'm pretty sure weighing 107 would put me in about a size 0-2 and although that's apparently "DESIRABLE" to the AHA, I'd be ecstatic with a 4 or 6!

Okay, now to the boring stuff...although I did lose another two pounds in the past two or three days courtesy of the stomach flu. I'm officially down (I gained a lb. or so back over the weekend but I prefer to think of this as a natural fluctuation) 10.2 lbs. total for the month (it'll be 4 weeks on Saturday since I started this diet...I mean (ahem) LIFESTYLE CHANGE. Saturday for breakfast I ate a whole wheat English muffin with peanut butter and water (no coffee). That day for lunch I had a whole wheat pita pizza with green olives, onion, mushrooms, sauce (from the jar) and about 3/4 c. low-fat mozzarella. I also finished off the last two bites of my son's ham and cheese sandwich and a remaining handful of blueberries. For dinner that evening, I had chicken fajitas on the grill with a little bit of salsa and light sour cream (probably only a TBSP each) and 10 or 12 tortilla chips with more salsa and more sour cream. I was starving...that's what happens when I wait too long to eat...I cheat! I had a LaCroix sparkling water with dinner too. Then after dinner, I broke my own rule and had a vodka/soda/lemon - but just one. No guilt - I've been under a lot of stress and needed to take the edge off.

Sunday I had coffee with CM and Splenda and it would appear - no breakfast. I know what you're thinking...'doesn't this dummy know that breakfast is the most important meal of the day?...It's what gets your metabolism going'. And yes, I know both of these things but like all full-time mothers and wives, I sometimes don't have time for breakfast, despite my best intentions. For lunch I had a whole wheat pita pizza again, but this time just with sauce and cheese...oh, and a string cheese too. I'm lazy that way. I don't like to put a lot of thought into what I'm making/eating so when I find something I like, that I also happen to have the ingredients for, I just go with it. That afternoon for a snack I ate a 1/2 c. of this new organic fruity, nutty, fiber-y cereal I bought and a 1/2 c. of fat free milk. I also had a sugar free chocolate Snack Pack pudding at some point that afternoon....hey, just reading it from my not-so-specific journal. That night for dinner I had a small New York strip, which incidentally was grilled to perfection, approximately 14 spears of asparaGAS and a small bowl of my son's leftover whole wheat elbow macaroni which happened to be covered it butter and Parmesan (picture me rolling my eyes here). Then, as the perfect end to the perfect day, I had 6 plain m&m's...quite possibly the world's most perfect food.

Monday I had a 1/2 c. of my healthy cereal again with 1/2 c. fat free milk for breakfast. I also had a banana and coffee (with the usual mixers). For lunch I had a salad with about 1/8 c. of feta crumbles and 6 cherry tomatoes. I spritzed it with one of those new salad spritzer dressings - the Italian one. You have to spray like 30 times to actually get the salad DAMP though so I'm pretty sure I had more than the 1g fat per-serving serving. I was so hungry about 3 hours later...I know, SHOCKER...that I had another 1/2 c. cereal covered in another 1/2 c. fat free milk. For dinner, I ate about 1 and 1/2 small grilled hamburgers dipped in ketchup and light Hidden Valley Ranch. One may have had melted cheddar on it too but my memory is foggy. Followed up with 3 m&m's. Boy, I'm sure not doing well with the no sweets, am I? Pffft.

The next two days are easy...I was sick with the stomach flu. Tuesday I had an orange, sugar free Popsicle and water. Wednesday I did eat more. Hello! Hadn't eaten in over 24 hours! I was watching the Today show that morning and their chef was making gourmet grilled cheese sandwiches. Now, I'll admit...I'm one who is easily swayed by the power of suggestion. I proceeded to make myself a grilled cheese sandwich, not with Gruyere and the fancy cheeses the chef used, but with two slices of Kraft deli-style American and butter, of course. Duh. I also had a can of Campbell's chicken noodle soup - the ultimate comfort food. I polished off two more sugar free Popsicles throughout the course of the afternoon. I had enjoyed my grilled cheese so immensely that I made my kiddo one for dinner that night...well, plus the pan was still out on the stove. Why dirty more dishes if I don't have to, right? He ate about half and I ate his other half, mind you this was about 8 hours after I had my first one that day, and it was just as good.

I was still recovering from my bug today and only got down about 3 sips of my usual coffee drink. I (yet again) had no time for breakfast - too busy catching up on my emails. For lunch I had a whole wheat pita with some lean turkey, a slice of Swiss cheese and a few tomato slices. I also ate a tangerine and about half a can of LaCroix. For a snack I had a banana. For dinner tonight - back to my old standby - I made a whole wheat pita pizza but measured out the 1/4 c. sauce and 1/4 c. mozzarella. I also had one bite of my kiddo's dessert, which was chocolate chip cookie dough ice cream. I'm officially sick of eating "healthy" pizza. And that is one of my biggest challenges right now....I don't know what to eat. As you can see I've been eating next to no veggies and only a moderate amount of fruits. I wish I was one of those people who could eat salad every day but I'm just not. I'm working on coming up with a plan for this little "issue" though and will fill you in on the brilliant solution I've come up with in my next post.

Sorry this was a bit lengthy and I promise to get another post up soon so I don't have to recap my life's story next time. Peace out.

Saturday, April 10, 2010

"I'm Just One Stomach Flu Away From my Goal Weight" -The Devil Wears Prada

Good news to share...finally! Last post, even though I was sick all week (still am BTW), I hadn't lost any weight in 4 days. Since then, I'm happy to say I'm down 4 more lbs. My eating has been a little bit flawed but overall, I've had a pretty good week.

Wednesday was a good day. I had half of a whole wheat pita with light cream cheese (about 1 tsp) and some lean turkey for breakfast. I also had my coffee (with Coffee Mate and Splenda of course). For lunch I had Lipton's cup-o-noodle soup. I had a really upset tummy that day and found a box of that from God-knows-when in my cubby at work. That stuff rocks...forgot how tasty it is (that might be the cold medicine talking though). I also ate a tomato slice off of my co-workers plate (it had Italian dressing on it too...mmmm). Later that afternoon, I had a banana. For dinner I ate a chicken breast with 3/4 c. brown rice and some light soy sauce. Water with all three meals.

Thursday I had coffee (with CM and Splenda) and a banana for breakfast. That day I had lunch plans with a friend at one of my favorite restaurants. Honestly, I was worried to go there at all....my favorite/usual dishes include chicken nachos (they are organic and made with creme fraiche...the best!) and a burger with gruyere. This is a good friend of mine although one I don't see nearly as often as I'd like. Right when I see her I ask how she's been and she blurts out "I'm fat now....I've gained sooo much weight!" Now, this girl is like 5'10", long blond hair, always tanned with designer handbag in tote. She looks beautiful, as always. I don't notice the weight gain she's referring to but I do notice that she's dyed her hair a slightly darker shade than usual (I like it). I scoff and tell her she looks gorgeous. F is not only one of my prettiest friends, she's probably one of the healthiest eaters I know too. She never drinks soda (always water or iced tea) and usually orders a salad wherever we go. We start catching up with each other. She talks about her love life (gotta love them single gals) and the all the fabulous places she's traveled recently. I talk about moving, my kid and inevitably about my diet/blog (yes, my life is much less glamorous than hers). "Have you read it yet?" I ask. No, she hasn't had time. I tell her a little bit about it and why I'm doing it, yada, yada, yada. She goes on to tell me that she's had food issues for as long as she can remember. Then she starts talking about how when she was a little girl, her mom received endless compliments about how thin and beautiful she was. F says from that very early age, she remembers thinking that she didn't ever want to be anything other than those two things...she wanted to be just like her mom. She says she remembers thinking "I can't eat that...I'll get fat" (ergo I won't be as thin and beautiful as my mom is) as a very young girl. She had an irrational fear (even though she was not an overweight child) that she'd become fat and therefore undesirable. She then tells me that her mom is overweight now. I tell her that my food issues never began until my 30's and that I've generally felt okay with my body. I know this sounds like a contradiction but it's not. I am not UNhappy being overweight; I just want to be thin. There is not some thinking on my part that I will be happier once I am thinner because I'm happy now. At any rate, I did stick to my guns and ordered something healthy - grilled chicken tacos and water (same as F). I skipped the shells and ate the grilled chicken breast along with some black beans and a little pico. And I felt satisfied without feeling stuffed, like I would have if I had gotten the burger. That night I had a cup of whole wheat spaghetti with sauce from the jar and 3 Starburst jelly beans from my kid's Easter basket for dessert.

Friday was a bit worse. I had a half of a whole wheat pita for breakfast with about a TBSP of peanut butter. No coffee - I must've been sick after all. We had a work outing yesterday afternoon and went bowling (we ate lunch there too). I had 2 pieces of pizza - one cheese and one veggie (tossed the crusts) and water. I planned on either having a) one slice of cheese pizza or b) no pizza, but I was really hungry. I don't think that's all that bad considering everyone else was drinking beer too. Last night for dinner I wasn't feeling well so I just ate about a third of my son's leftover hot dog and a bite of his orange jello, before tossing the rest.

For some strange reason I was up a little over a pound this morning from yesterday. Not sure if it was the pizza (salt) or what but I really don't see how it's possible to gain that overnight. I guess that's payback for my poor decision yesterday. I'm hoping after eating healthfully today and tomorrow, I'll be back down to 164 by Monday morning.

Wednesday, April 7, 2010

Not One Ounce...

Sorry it's been a little while since my last post. I'm in the process of moving and as an added bonus, I've been under the weather, which incidentally has been really good for my diet because I've had no appetite these past few days. I have been doing really well with my eating with the exception of last weekend. We were busy packing on Saturday and I needed a quick lunch for my boys...McDonald's again. Hey, it's fast and easy and close to our house (not much else is). In the name of saving time and effort (most of our food was gone at this point), I broke down and ordered a double cheeseburger for myself off the dollar menu too but skipped the fries and I still haven't had a single can of soda (I can hardly believe this myself). I made up for my indiscretion that evening though. Since we were up to our eyeballs in boxes, my parents graciously invited us over for dinner (well, I actually invited us) and ordered pizza. I ordered a Greek salad for myself and didn't have a single bite of pizza.

Sunday went well and I ate healthily at both breakfast and dinner. I can't remember the details now though (I'm finally ready to admit that my memory isn't what it used to be...I blame that on having a kid and have since started writing down everything as I eat it). That night we had dinner with out-of-town friends. I had never met them before - they were friends of my husband's back from long before we had even met. Now before I get into my cheatastic meal, let me just say that I was having a really long day with all the stress that goes along with moving. Anyway, at dinner that night I had two bottles of Blue Moon (I know...not even light beer). Then the group I was with ordered an appetizer of chorizo queso. Okay, so maybe I recommended it...the stuff is amazing. I had about 3 chips and a tortilla with queso. I did order a Caesar salad for my entree though and water. Could've been much worse. Let me just get off the subject of my food diary here for a minute and relay a little story. While we were getting ready to order, F asks, "what are you gonna have?" I reply, "I'm on a diet...probably just a salad" to which she responds, "I know. I have been following your blog. And not only having I been following it, my whole office is following". Cocked eyebrow...I start thinking about this...strangers...following my every dieting misstep? Good LORD. What have I done?

Monday I ate a banana for breakfast, along with my usual coffee/Coffee Mate/splenda concoction. For lunch I had a whole wheat pita with turkey and a slice of Swiss cheese. For dinner it was a whole wheat pita (pizza-size) with sauce (from the jar), mini pepperoni and low-fat mozzarella cheese. I ate part of my son's uneaten pizza too - well, mainly just the cheese. I know, I know.

So as you can see I have done relatively well with regards to eating healthily and yet, for some mysterious and annoying reason, I haven't dropped one ounce these past 4 days. I'm trying not to get frustrated here. Maybe I just lost too much too quickly those first two weeks and my metabolism is just playing catch-up. Or maybe I've plateaued already and need to start exercising. Whatever the case may be, I'm going to stay positive and try a few new "tricks" this week...such as eating less carbs and eating more fruits and veggies again. I kind of OD'ed after those first two weeks but clearly I need to add more back into my diet again.

Friday, April 2, 2010

I McCheated...Big Time

After a long, audible sigh, I'm ready to begin writing this post. You can already see where this is going from the title. But let me start on a positive note (before we get to the ugliness)...I have lost another pound (7 total now in 13 days). Yay me!

Okay - to pick up where I left off, I had a whole wheat pita with pizza sauce (from the jar) and a half a cup of reduced fat mozzarella (a healthy, mini pizza) for dinner on Wednesday night. I also made one for my son (but added mini pepperoni to his - have you seen these? They are adorable!). I devoured mine in about 5 minutes I was so hungry (this is becoming common-place for me). He's a more discerning eater than I am these days and he casually ate two or three of his miniature slices. When he announced he was "done", I ate the rest of his...well, mainly just the cheese and pepperoni (not so much the pita). For dessert my kiddo had an M & M ice cream sandwich; it was his treat for behaving like a civilized human being at the grocery store on the way home that day. He didn't finish that either and I had 3 bites. There was still about half left but I threw it in the trash, feeling somewhat regretful that I had succumbed even to those 3 bites.

Thursday morning I had half of a whole wheat English muffin with a thin layer of light cream cheese and some lean turkey. Let me back up a second and say that when I went into the kitchen at work to make my breakfast, someone had brought in DUNKIN DONUTS! Now...doughnuts are pretty much my favorite food in the whole wide world but I somehow managed to walk by them at least 5 times yesterday and never even opened the lid (well, maybe once I did). Awesome self-control if I do say so myself. Yesterday for lunch I had a 6" sweet onion chicken teriyaki sandwich on whole wheat from Subway. I have always wanted to try this sub, even though chicken is just "meh" to me, but never have because I love their tuna and their spicy Italian - two of the worst, most fattening sandwiches they have, naturally. I had a LaCroix sparkling water with it. No soda, no chips. Which brings me to my McCheat last night. We stopped by my parents' house on the way home and by the time we were headed home it was already 7:00. Kiddo was hungry (I was beyond hungry) and there's a McDonald's on the way so I thought hey, I'll just stop and get him a happy meal and I'll make something healthy (perhaps another little pizza?) for myself after he goes to bed at 8:00. I promise you...I really thought this. But while I was in the drive-thru waiting my turn, I had a little time to ponder it and decided I would get a regular hamburger for myself too. I remembered hearing once (from an ultra-thin friend) that their hamburgers were only like 300 calories (I checked today - they only have 250 calories). I proceeded to eat the entire hamburger on the way home (keep in mind we only live 4 blocks away). After my son finished his dinner (that's code for "ate half"), I ate his remaining two chicken McNuggets and about 12 of his french fries. Then I had ONE (I swear) mini whopper egg. *Another audible sigh*

This little indiscretion, however, has taught me a valuable lesson. When I eat nothing between lunch and dinner, I am so hungry by the time I get home that I put myself at risk of grabbing a bag of potato chips out of the pantry (I wouldn't have them in the house at all if I didn't live with other people who have their weight under control) and eating half the bag. Through this experience, I have come to realize that I need to eat something before I leave the office every day. I need to arrive at home (or wherever I'm going) about half full so I will not make hasty decisions that I will come to regret. And I plan to do just that from here on out. Strangely enough, I don't seem to have as much of a problem on the weekends. I think it's because I'm not as rushed. Rushing causes mistakes - and dieting is no exception to this rule.