It's just a gut feeling...

Day 6 of my diet and still plugging along. Tuesday I ate a banana for breakfast with my cup of coffee (will never give THAT up), a pear for a morning snack and veggies with 2 TBSP. Light Hidden Valley Ranch for lunch. That night I was pretty hungry, as you can imagine, and had a cup of whole wheat macaroni for dinner with half a cup of spaghetti sauce (from the jar) and a pinch (or 3) of parmesan. Went to bed satisfied and let's face it, it's nice not to be awoken in the night by stomach grumblings.

Yesterday I had a hard-boiled egg, a handful of blueberries and a small turkey sausage patty for breakfast (thanks to another dieting co-worker who's much more organized than I am). Oh, and coffee of course. For lunch I ate a small whole wheat pita with some lean turkey and a slice of melted swiss cheese plus a small bowl of veggies (peppers and cherry tomatoes again - that's kind of my thing).

Now up until this point I haven't really gone into detail about what I'm cutting out. I have cut out all processed foods (with the exception of that spaghetti sauce on Tuesday night), all sugars that aren't natural and booze. Some of you are saying to yourselves "booze...really"? Well...yes. For the the time being at least, I plan on cutting it out. It's not all that difficult for me. I'm not a big drinker unless it's social and even then, I can usually take it or leave it. Don't get me wrong, there are exceptions to this rule (e.g. last December when I drank a vodka drink every night for a month). What has been the most difficult thing to cut out (right after chocolate, that is) is diet Coke. I miss the fizz...I miss the beautiful shiny can, I miss the caffeine (at least the daily headaches have finally stopped). So yesterday I was having serious d.c. withdrawls. Light bulb! I suddenly remembered one of my friends who used to drink club soda with a twist at her desk (she sat right next to me). At this point, even that sounded good to me...at least I'd get my fizz fix! So I went and got a huge fountain club soda from the cafe downstairs and put a lemon slice in it and after drinking about half, my carbonation craving was sated. I threw the rest in the trash. Now if that had been d.c., I would've drank the entire thing, thirsty or not, because it's laced with aspertame and boy is that good stuff!

Yesterday afternoon I had a pear and a piece of string cheese for a snack. I still have family in town and went to my mom and dad's for dinner again last night. My mom had made a homemade (pre-bought crust) pizza that was piled high with like 4 different types of meat. For the side, she made an awesome salad with feta and all the good fixings. I wasn't all that hungry at dinner (go figure) but took a piece of pizza and a big helping of salad. Well...bigger than I would've normally taken. I felt guilty right away taking the slice of pizza but I rationalized (yet again) that I had barely ingested any calories during the day so why not? I ate the salad first. I ate a bite of pizza here and there and by the half way point, I was done. I was full and actually listened to my gut and stopped eating. It took a conscious effort to stop but I did (it also helped that the pizza wasn't fabulous...thanks mom!).

I'm reading this book right now called The Principal of the Path. It's about listening to your gut, not when it comes to food (although I think this may somehow apply) but when it comes to everyday decisions. What to eat or not eat is a decision we're faced with every day. And although it may not seem as important as other life-changing decisions, such as how much to spend on a house or whether or not you should buy that $400 purse, it's the same voice telling us not to do something (like eat that cupcake). Which brings me to my point. Stopping eating when I'm full has always been a huge challenge for me. My eyes are often bigger than my stomach so I tend to take/order large portions. Rather than stopping when I'm full, sometimes even when I'm stuffed, I usually finish what's on my plate...particularly if it's something really good. Now I know full well that I'll be miserable in an hour or two but I do it anyway, ignoring that inner voice. Why? I wish I knew. It's not like there's a shortage of food in this country (at least not for most people thankfully). It's not as if I don't know where my next meal's coming from. If I only ate half and got hungry again in an hour, I could just walk over to the fridge and get something else.

I promise I will talk about how much weight I've (hopefully) lost in the next post. My scale has been in storage since we put our house on the market last November but I finally bought a new one on my lunch break today. At this point I can't even be sure 174 lbs. was my starting weight as I was recently informed that my parents' scale (the one I did my initial weigh-in on) is "broken". God, if it's higher than that, I'm gonna have to make another batch of soup.